Scott Pilgrim Vs The World was a cultural success in 2010. Although the film did not do well in theatres, it was met with great critical response and built a huge fan base. It even inspired a video game called Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World: The Game that will soon be re-released.
Scott Pilgrim Vs The World is a cult film (a consolation prize for many who hoped the first film would become a franchise). This film blends comedy, action, and romance to create a film that is true to Bryan Lee O’Malley’s source comic and an entertaining movie for people who have not read the books.
The film’s charm lies in its dialogue. Many great lines have been adapted from the comic. Here are some of the most memorable Scott Pilgrim Vs The World Quotes.
Best Scott Pilgrim vs The World Quotes
1. Wallace: If you want something bad, you have to fight for it. Step up your game, Scott. Break out the L word.
Scott Pilgrim was a child who didn’t want his parents to love him. He would have to discuss his feelings to do that openly. Wallace, his roommate, was there to give him a much-needed pep talk. Maybe he just wanted Scott to watch The L Word, a Showtime series.
2. Because I’m in lesbians with you. I really, really mean it. – Scott
The lesson is still relevant! It’s kind of. Scott can tell Ramona his true feelings about “the L word”. She is as confused as one would expect, but she goes with the flow.
3. Chicken isn’t vegan? – Todd Ingram
If veganism gave you superpowers, I would eat lettuce and drink soymilk for the rest of my life. This is not the case. This is why I will continue to enjoy hot wings. Unfortunately, Todd can’t eat Chicken Parmesan as a part of a vegan diet. Gelato is also not vegan. “Milk, eggs, b*tch.”
4. No vegan diet, NO VEGAN POWERS! — Officer John Punnisherman of the Vegan Police (Probably)
What good is a society that doesn’t have rules?
5. If I peed my pants would you pretend that I just got wet from the rain? – Scott
This is something that only true love could do. Scott’s only problem is that it didn’t rain.
6. Is that girl a boy too? – Wallace
If your band goes by the name “Crash and the Boys”, you have two options. You can either live in the 1950s and let only men join, or you can B. Change your name. Wallace Wells, the King of Sass, will always be there for you to make it right.
7. You once were a ve-gone, but now you will be gone. – Scott
Scott is the most skilled fighter in the province. His post-battle catchphrases are a bit lacking.
8. I gotta pee on her!… I mean, I gotta pee. Pee time. – Scott
Scott isn’t making an impression of Dave Chappelle or channeling his inner “alleged” R. Kelly. This is just a glimpse into our brains when we don’t know what we should say. So we make up something really stupid.
9. The only thing keeping me and her apart is the two minutes it’s gonna take to kick your ass. – Lucas Lee
Scott Pilgrim not only headbutted Superman into unconsciousness but also sent Captain America flying toward his doom. Although Ramona’s evil ex-partners most liked Lucas, it could have been the Chris Evans effect.
10. You made me swallow my gum! That’s going to be in my digestive tract for seven years! – Gideon
Do you remember when as a child, you were challenged to chew gum? It may still be in your digestive system (not really, but you can look into it if it’s a concern). Gideon now has plenty of reason to seek revenge because he didn’t do it before.
11. You broke the heart that broke mine. – Knives
Ah, teenage infatuation. Emotions take control, and logic is completely lost. Knives Chau somehow convinced herself that Scott was her sole responsibility.
12. You punched me in the boob. Prepare to die, obviously! – Roxy
Bro, I think you were raised much better.
13. Wallace? Again? – Stacey
Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World is about Scott winning Ramona’s heart and getting rid of all the competition. Wallace is attracting the attention of every man he can while he does all that. It’s even funnier that he stole Stacey’s boyfriend. Later, you will see Wallace, Jimmy (Other Scott), Scott, and Scott sharing the same bed.
14. Didn’t You Get My Email Explaining The Situation?
Scott Pilgrim’s greatest feature is its absurd logic. Scott Pilgrim’s story is set in Toronto, a time before cell phones. This sets up Scott’s first battle with Matthew Patel.
Scott’s confused ex-boyfriend, who looks like a pirate, responds to Scott’s sincere question about why he wanted to fight. He also inquires whether Scott received his email. After Scott admits that he had only “skimmed” his email, Patel explodes and starts the fight.
15. He Just Left.
Scott’s character arc includes the fact that Scott dates Knives Chau (Ellen Wong) while Ramona is his girlfriend. Knives visit Scott’s apartment in the early stages of his relationship. We see Scott running to the kitchen as Wallace, his roommate (Kieran Culkin), answers the door. Knives ask Scott if Scott is there, and Scott jumps headfirst out of the window. “He just left.”
Wallace is a big fan of Knives, and he feels guilty covering up for Scott. We see Scott reach through the window to get his quote. It’s a brilliant piece of physical comedy, and Culkin delivers the lines with great humor.
16. WE ARE SEX BOB OMB AND WE ARE HERE TO WATCH SCOTT PILGRIM KICK YOUR TEETH IN!
Scott is a neglected bandmate of Mark Webber, Kim Pine (Allison Pill), Young Neil (Johnny Simmons), and Stephen Stills (Mark Webber). After they sell out to the seventh evil ex, it seems that Scott’s friendships have been dissolved.
Scott then apologizes to his bandmates. As a surprise, Kim shouts the band’s countdown for Scott to set a beat as he begins the final battle, one last act of solidarity for Sex Bobomb’s former bassist.
17. Bread Makes You Fat?
Ramona finally comes over to Scott’s apartment after several dates. Things begin slow, but things improve once they sit down to eat Scott’s favorite dish, garlic bread. Scott confesses that he would love to eat garlic bread more often, but Ramona counters by providing basic nutrition knowledge, which Scott can’t believe.
Through a large mouthful, he exclaims, “bread makes you fat?” This quote is the highlight of the whole date night sequence.
18. He Punched The Highlights Out Of Her Hair!!!
Todd Ingram, Ramona’s third and evil ex (played by Brandon Routh, who learned to play bass for this role), is a sophisticated-looking vegan with psychic mind abilities. Scott is also currently dating Envy (Brie Larson), a woman who does not like Knives.
Todd signals her to stop yelling, and he hits Knives so hard that her hair is bloated with blue highlights. Young Neil assists her and weeps in shock at what has happened. It’s an incredibly shocking moment that shows how evil Todd is and makes Todd’s downfall all the more satisfying.
19. Tell It To The Cleaning Lady On Monday.
After punching Scott through a wall with his fist, Todd smartly criticizes Scott’s grammar. This strikes a nerve, and Todd tells Scott that he will “tell it to her on Monday.” Because there will be dust Monday. Because you will be pulverized within two seconds. The cleaning lady… cleans up… dust. She dusts. She has weekends off, so she can dust on Monday. “Right?” For a moment, all the tension dissipates as everyone realizes that Todd is not only a girl-hitting jerk but also a moron who is incapable of delivering any good retorts.
20. This One’s For The Guy In The Balcony That Keeps Yelling At Us. It’s Called ‘We Hate You, Please Die.’
Wallace, Scott’s roommate, is one of the funniest characters in the movie. He is completely detached from all the crazy battles and loyal to tell Scott what he should do. Scott’s sister is also a victim of his stealing. Wallace, who is at the Battle of the Bands at the Rock-it’s first round, puts on a show of confidence by heckling the Boys and Crash while he’s there.
The singer suddenly snaps, “This is for the guy on the balcony who keeps screaming at us.” It’s called “We Hate You, Please Die.” It occurs in the film’s early scenes. The zaniness of this story is still unfolding, so the entire exchange is completely hilarious and unplanned.
Other Scott Pilgrim Vs The World Quotes
Stephen Stills: I’m afraid I have some bad news.
Kim Pine: Is it the news that we suck? Because I really don’t think I can take it.
Scott Pilgrim: Dude, what do you know about Romana Flowers??
Scott Pilgrim: Dude, what do you know about Romana Flowers?
Comeau: All I know is that she’s American.
Scott Pilgrim: *sigh* Americann…
Scott Pilgrim: American…
Scott Pilgrim: What is the website for Amazon.ca ?
Scott Pilgrim: What is the website for Amazon.ca?
Wallace Wells: Amazon.ca..
Wallace Wells: Amazon.ca.
Scott Pilgrim: You know what sucks?
Wallace Wells: What?
Scott Pilgrim: EVERYTHING.
Scott Pilgrim: (to Knives) Ciao, Knives!
Scott Pilgrim: [to Knives] Ciao, Knives!
Scott Pilgrim: I kind of feel like I’m on drugs when I’m with you. Not that I do drugs. Unless you do drugs. Then I do drugs all the time, every drug.
Ramona Flowers: Dude, I’m changing
Scott Pilgrim: Ah! [covers his eyes] Sorry. It’s just cold.
Ramona Flowers: Here. Does that help?
Scott Pilgrim: Yeah, that’s very warm. What is that? [Scott’s hands are pulled away to reveal Ramona] Okay…
Scott Pilgrim: You cocky cock! You’ll pay for your crimes against humanity!
Lucas Lee: (checks phone) Hahaha! That’s actually hilarious.
Lucas Lee: [checks phone] Hahaha! That’s actually hilarious.
Scott Pilgrim: Wait! We’re fighting over Ramona?
Matthew Patel: Didn’t you get my E-mail explaining the situation?
Scott Pilgrim: I skimmed it.
Ramona V. Flowers : This is good garlic bread.
Scott Pilgrim : Yeah, I think garlic bread would have to be my favourite all-time food. I could eat it for every meal. Or just constantly, without stopping.
Ramona V. Flowers : Then you’d get fat.
Scott Pilgrim : No, why would I get fat?
Ramona V. Flowers : Because bread makes you fat.
Scott Pilgrim : Bread makes you fat?
Scott Pilgrim : We are Sex Bob-Omb and we are here to make you think about death and get sad and stuff.
Scott Pilgrim : I have to go pee due to boredom.
Ramona V. Flowers : What kind of tea do you want?
Scott Pilgrim : There’s more than one kind?
Ramona V. Flowers : We have blueberry, raspberry, ginseng, sleepy time, green tea, green tea with lemon, green tea with lemon and honey, liver disaster, ginger with honey, ginger without honey, vanilla almond, white truffel, blueberry chamomile, vanilla walnut, constant comment and… earl grey.
Scott Pilgrim : Did you make some of those up?
Knives Chau : I’ve never even kissed a guy before.
Scott Pilgrim : Hey… me neither.
Scott Pilgrim : I know you play mysterious and aloof just to avoid getting hurt. And I know you have reasons for not wanting talk about your past. I want you to know that I don’t care about any of that stuff. Because I’m in lesbians with you.
Todd Ingram : We have an unfinished business. I and he.
Scott Pilgrim : He and me.
Todd Ingram : Don’t you talk to me about grammar!
Stacey Pilgrim : [Scott has just broken up with Ramona] Did you really see a future with this girl?
Scott Pilgrim : Like… with jet-packs?
Computer : You’ve got mail.
Scott Pilgrim : [Turns To Wallace] Dude, this thing claims I have mail.
Wallace Wells : [groggily] It’s amazing what we can do with computers these days.
Scott Pilgrim : [Turns back] Dude, now I’m totally reading it.
Wallace Wells : [sarcastic] I’m so happy for you.
Scott Pilgrim : Amazon.ca! What’s the website for that?
Wallace Wells : Amazon.ca
Scott Pilgrim : Hey so, can this not be a one-night stand? For one thing I didn’t even get any. That was a joke.
Ramona V. Flowers : What did you have in mind?
Scott Pilgrim : Oh, come to this first round of this battle of the bands thing.
Ramona V. Flowers : You have a band?
Scott Pilgrim : Yeah, we’re terrible. Please come.
Ramona V. Flowers : [sighs] Sure.[leaves]
Scott Pilgrim : Oh wait, can I get your number?
Ramona V. Flowers : Here.
Scott Pilgrim : Wow… girl number…
Ramona V. Flowers : See you at the show Scott Pilgrim.
Scott Pilgrim : Oh hey it’s tonight! At the…
Julie Powers : So, what can I *censored* get you?
Scott Pilgrim : Is there anywhere you don’t work?
Julie Powers : They’re called jobs, something a *censored* ball like you wouldn’t know anything about. And by the way, I can’t *censored* believe you asked Ramona out after I specifically told you not to *censored* do that!
Scott Pilgrim : How are you doing that with your mouth?
Julie Powers : Never *censored* mind how I’m doing it!
Stacey Pilgrim : Next time, we don’t date the girl with eleven evil ex-boyfriends.
Scott Pilgrim : It’s seven.
Stacey Pilgrim : Oh, well, that’s not that bad.
Scott Pilgrim : So what you’re saying is we’re dating?
Ramona V. Flowers : I guess.
Scott Pilgrim : Does that mean we can make out?
Ramona V. Flowers : Sure.
Wallace Wells : Guess who’s drunk!
Scott Pilgrim : I guess Wallace.
Wallace Wells : You guess right!
Stacey Pilgrim : 17-year-old? Scandal.
Scott Pilgrim : Who told you.
Stacey Pilgrim : Wallace, duh.
Scott Pilgrim : That gossipy bitch.
Wallace Wells : [on the phone listening] You know me.
Kim Pine : Scott Pilgrim, you’re the salt of the earth.
Scott Pilgrim : Thanks, Kim.
Kim Pine : I meant “scum” of the earth.
Knives Chau : Hey Scott!
Scott Pilgrim : What the hell…
Ramona V. Flowers : Who is that girl again?
Stephen Stills : Scott dated her.
Scott Pilgrim : Briefly.
Ramona V. Flowers : How old is she?
Scott Pilgrim : Uhhhhhhhh…[the camera goes into his head. We see a wheel listing various thoughts. The arrow gets stuck between “I gotta pee” and “Who, her?”]
Scott Pilgrim : I gotta pee on her!… I mean, I gotta pee. Pee time.
Other Scott : And you didn’t bang her? Are you gay?
Scott Pilgrim : I couldn’t stop thinking about my stupid ex-girlfriend.
Jimmy : Is that the Uma Thurman movie?
Ramona V. Flowers : Listen, I know I can be hard to be around sometimes. I totally understand if you don’t want to hang anymore.
Scott Pilgrim : No, no, I want to hang. It’s… You know, the whole evil ex-boyfriend thing…
Ramona V. Flowers : Exes…
Scott Pilgrim : It’s no biggie. Um. You know, I know it’s early, but I don’t think anything can get in the way of how I SHIT![Camera cuts to Scott’s ex standing behind Ramona]
Scott Pilgrim : Why can’t we have our own secret shows?
Kim Pine : All of our shows are secret shows.
Matthew Patel : This is impossible. How can this be?
Scott Pilgrim : Open your eyes. Maybe you’ll see!
Scott Pilgrim : You know what really sucks?[Spells out “sux” with refrigerator magnets]
Wallace Wells : What?
Scott Pilgrim : [Rotates a magnet numeral 8 on its side, the mathematical symbol for infinity] Everything…
Scott Pilgrim : Hey You totally came!
Ramona V. Flowers : Yes I did totally come…
Stacey Pilgrim : You should break up with your fake highschool girlfriend!
Scott Pilgrim : Wait who told you?
Stacey Pilgrim : Wallace.
Scott Pilgrim : He’s not even conscious!
Hipster Bouncer : What’s the password?
Scott Pilgrim : Uh… whatever…
Hipster Bouncer : Cool…
Kim Pine : Scott, if your life had a face, I would punch it.
Scott Pilgrim : Hahahaha… wait, what?
Kim Pine : I mean, are you really happy or really evil?
Scott Pilgrim : Evil? You mean, do I have, like, ulterior motives? I’m offended, Kim.
Kim Pine : Wounded, even?
Scott Pilgrim : Hurt, Kim.
Wallace Wells : You doing okay there?
Scott Pilgrim : Yeah, good, good, good. She changed her hair.
Wallace Wells : So, it looks nice blue!
Scott Pilgrim : Yeah I know, but she did it without making a big deal out of it or anything… She’s fickle, impulsive, spontaneous… God what am I going to do?
Scott Pilgrim : Oh God!
Wallace Wells : What is it, Scott?
Scott Pilgrim : I had this totally weird dream…
Other Scott : Oh God!
Wallace Wells : What is it, Other Scott?
Other Scott : Can we skip the dream time? Color me not interested.
Scott Pilgrim : But there was this girl…
Wallace Wells : Girl…
Other Scott : Is this an envy-related dream again?
Wallace Wells : You don’t use the “e” word in this house.
Scott Pilgrim : Hey, what’s up?
Ramona V. Flowers : Nothing.
Scott Pilgrim : Hey, you know Pac-man?
Ramona V. Flowers : I know of him.
Scott Pilgrim : Well, Pac-man was originally called Puck-man. They changed it because… Not because Pac-man looks like a hockey puck. “Paku Paku” means “flap your mouth”, and they were worried that people would change, scratch out the P turn it into an F, like…
Ramona V. Flowers : Yeah, that’s amazing.
Scott Pilgrim : Um… Am I dreaming? I’ll leave you alone forever now.
Ramona V. Flowers : Thanks.
Wallace Wells : Hey, what’s up with his outfit?
Guy in Crowd : Yeah, is he a pirate?
Scott Pilgrim : Are you a pirate?
Matthew Patel : Pirates are in this year!
Scott Pilgrim : You’re pretentious, this club sucks, I have beef. Let’s do it.
Scott Pilgrim : That guy on bass…
Envy Adams : Oh, yeah.
Scott Pilgrim : That’s Todd.
Ramona V. Flowers : I know.
Envy Adams : Oh, yeah!
Scott Pilgrim : You know?
Envy Adams : OH, YEAH!
Scott Pilgrim : Oh, no.
Scott Pilgrim : [from trailer] You know her?
Ramona V. Flowers : It was just a phase.
Scott Pilgrim : You had a sexy phase?
Ramona V. Flowers : I was just a litte bi-curious.
Roxy Richter : I’m just a little bi-furious!
Kim Pine : Scott. Not that I care, but you should go talk to Ramona before she’s gone.
Scott Pilgrim : Thanks, Kim.
Kim Pine : And I really don’t care.
Ramona V. Flowers : He was a snot-nosed little brat. He just followed me around.
Scott Pilgrim : He had snot in his nose? But he’s famous.
Wallace Wells : Scott, you know I love you. But I need my own bed tonight. It’s for sex.
Scott Pilgrim : Right.
Wallace Wells : I may need it for the rest of the week too… and the year.
Scott Pilgrim : Right, I get it.
Wallace Wells : Hey, maybe you can move in with Ramona.
Scott Pilgrim : [pause as Scott shakes his head] She’s with Gideon now.
Wallace Wells : Ah, that sucks, but you know it’s probably just because he’s better than you.
Scott Pilgrim : I have to pee.
Roxy Richter : Oh I’d love to postpone, but I just cashed in my last rain check.
Scott Pilgrim : Where’s that from?
Roxy Richter : My brain!
Stephen Stills : [as a 1UP appears in front of Scott] What are you doing?
Scott Pilgrim : Getting a life.[grabs 1UP]
Scott Pilgrim : [Roxy confronts Scott and Ramona] You know this girl?
Roxy Richter : Oh boy, does she know me.
Scott Pilgrim : [to Ramona] What is she talking about?
Roxy Richter : [to Ramona] He really doesn’t know?
Scott Pilgrim : Wait…[Gauge in Scott’s head flips from “No Clue” to “Gets It”]
Ramona V. Flowers : Uh, Scott Pilgrim?
Scott Pilgrim : Hi. I was thinking about asking you out, but then I realized how stupid that would be. So do you want to go out sometime?
Ramona V. Flowers : Um, no, that’s ok. You can just sign for this, all right?
Scott Pilgrim : I just woke up, and you were in my dream. I dreamt that you were delivering me this package. Is that weird?
Ramona V. Flowers : It’s not weird at all.
Scott Pilgrim : It’s not?
Ramona V. Flowers : You just have this convenient subspace highway running through your head that I like to use. It’s like three miles in 15 seconds.
Scott Pilgrim : Right, right.
Ramona V. Flowers : I forgot you guys don’t have that in Canada.
Scott Pilgrim : You don’t remember me, do you? We met at the party the other day.
Ramona V. Flowers : Were you the Pac-man guy?
Scott Pilgrim : No. Not even. That was some total ass. I was the other guy.
Ramona V. Flowers : You know, you need to sign for this- whatever this is.
Scott Pilgrim : But if I sign for it you’ll leave.
Ramona V. Flowers : Yeah, it’s how it works.
Scott Pilgrim : Okey. Well, maybe, do you wanna hang out sometime? Get to know each other. You’re the new kid on the block, right? I’ve lived here forever, so there are reasons for you to hang out with me.
Ramona V. Flowers : You want me to hang out with you?
Scott Pilgrim : Um, yeah, if that’s cool.
Ramona V. Flowers : If I say yes, will you sign for your damn package?
Scott Pilgrim : So yeah. 8:00?
Stephen Stills : Oh god!… oh man! This is a nightmare! Is this a nightmare? Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up…!
Scott Pilgrim : It’s just nerves!
Kim Pine : Once we’re on stage, you’ll be fine.
Stephen Stills : We were just on stage for sound check, and the sound guy hated us!
Scott Pilgrim : I don’t think I can hit a girl. They’re soft.
Some Guy : [whispering] It’s for Scott.
Wallace Wells : [takes the phone from Some Guy and passes it to Scott] It’s for you, big guy.
Scott Pilgrim : [takes the phone] Hello?
Gideon Gordon Graves : Hey, pal! I just wanna say I feel terrible about earlier. I don’t want any hard feelings, so I figured, why not be the bigger man, and just give you a call.
Scott Pilgrim : Is Ramona with you?
Gideon Gordon Graves : I dunno…[to a brainwashed Ramona]
Gideon Gordon Graves : Are you with me?
Ramona V. Flowers : [deadpan] Yeah.[Scott screams in agony on phone]
Gideon Gordon Graves : Geez, buddy, it’s gonna be all right!
Scott Pilgrim : No, I just spilled hot cocoa on my crotch!
Gideon Gordon Graves : Mm-hmm… Listen, as you know, I’m opening a new Chaos Theatre in Toronto, and the Sex Bobs are playing our grand opening tonight, and it would feel really weird for all of us if you weren’t there. They just did a soundtrack, and the acoustics here are *amazing*!
Scott Pilgrim : [looking intense] Yeah, maybe I’ll see you there.
Gideon Gordon Graves : I hope so amigo. I don’t want any more bad blood between exes. What do you say?
Scott Pilgrim : Mm-hmm
Gideon Gordon Graves : OK, laytaz’![hangs up]
Wallace Wells : What a perfect asshole.[Scott notices that Wallace was listening in on another phone]
Wallace Wells : Forget what I said earlier.[hangs up phone]
Wallace Wells : Finish him.[Scott dramatically gears up, and runs off to the Chaos Theatre for the “final level” as Wallace and Some Guy watch from inside]
Julie Powers : What about Ramona Flowers?
Scott Pilgrim : You know her? Tell me now.
Scott Pilgrim : Can we please stop all this fighting! Nobody stole anybody. Knives, I dated you and then I dated Ramona. Okay?[beat; realizes what he said]
Scott Pilgrim : Maybe I forgot to tell Knives right away?
Knives Chau : You cheated on me, Scott? You cheated on both of us?
Ramona V. Flowers : You cheated on me with Knives?
Scott Pilgrim : No, I cheated on Knives with you.
Ramona V. Flowers : Is there a difference?
Scott Pilgrim : [sheepishly] You weren’t wronged?[Scott is immediately stabbed in the back by Gideon]
Gideon Gordon Graves : [through gritted teeth] Game over![Scott falls to the ground, crumpled over – dead]
Gideon Gordon Graves : Scottie. You can cheat on these ladies all you want, but you can’t… cheat… death.
Roxy Richter: you punchec me in the boob prepare to die obviously
Roxy Richter: You punched me in the boob! Prepare to die, obviously.
Scott Pilgrim: You know what sucks the most?
Wallace Wells: What?
Scott Pilgrim: Everything…
Matthew Patel: This is impossible, how can this be?
Scott Pilgrim: Open your eyes, maybe you’ll see.
Scott Pilgrim: This sucks. I’m gonna pee due to boredom.
Crash: My name is Crash, and these are the boys.
Wallace Wells: Is that girl a boy too?
Scott Pilgrim: Hi, I was thinking about asking you out but then I realized how stupid that would be.
Scott Pilgrim: So do you wanna go out sometime?
Wallace Wells: Kick her in the balls!
Crash: This next song goes out to the guy who keeps yelling from the balcony. It’s called, “We Hate You, Please Die.”
Crash: This next song goes out to the guy who keeps yelling from the balcony. It’s called, ‘We Hate You, Please Die.’
Wallace Wells: Sweet! Love this one.
Knives Chau: What do you play?
Young Neil: Wow, um, Zelda, Tetris… That’s kind of a big question.
Scott Pilgrim: “If I peed my pants, would you pretend I just got wet from the rain?”
Scott Pilgrim: If I peed my pants, would you pretend I just got wet from the rain?
Kim Pine: Where’s Knives? Not comin’ tonight?
Scott Pilgrim: Naw, we broke up .. hey, check it out, I learned the bass line from Final Fantasy II [plays]
Kim Pine: [into mike] Scott, you are the salt of the earth.
Scott Pilgrim: Thanks!
Kim Pine: [into mike] I meant scum of the earth.
Young Neil: You broke up with Knives?
Scott Pilgrim: Yeah, but don’t worry, maybe soon you’ll meet my “new-new” girlfriend.
Young Neil: New .. new ..
Stephen Stills: OK, from here on out, no girlfriends, nor girlfriend talk at practice, wether they’re old, new, or ‘new-new’ .. we were lucky to survive the last round, it’s sudden death now! OK!?
Scott Pilgrim: OK! [starts playing] [doorbell rings] That’s for me!
Matthew Patel: [crashing into the concert] Mister Pilgrim! It is I, Matthew Patel! Consider our fight begun! [lunges in slow motion at Scott]
Scott Pilgrim: [dumb-founded] What did I do?! What do I do?
Wallace Wells: Fight!
Todd Ingram: [to Scott after sending him flying through some walls] I can read your thoughts. Your will is broken. You’re through.
Scott Pilgrim: [holds up two cups of coffee] Say we drink to my memory. Fair-trade blend with soy milk?
Envy Adams: Oh, please. But that’s pathetic.
Todd Ingram: Dude. I saw into your mind’s eye. You put half-and-half in one of those coffees in attempt to make me break vegan edge. I’ll take the one with soy. [takes one of the coffees via telekenesis] Thanks, tool. [and he drinks from it]
Scott Pilgrim: Actually, mucacho, I put the coffee in this cup. But I thought really hard to put it in that one, ‘in my mind’s eye’ or whatever.
Todd Ingram: [disbelief] What are you talking about?
Scott Pilgrim: You just drank half-and-half, baby.
Todd Ingram: Sounds like someone wants to get funky.
Stephen Stills: [shouting over Crash and the Boy’s overpowering song] How are we supposed to follow this?! We’re not gonna win! We’re not gonna sign with G-Man! We’re not gonna play opening night as the Chaos Theater! Goddammit, Scott! Will you not just keep standing there, you’re freaking me out!
Crash: Good evening. I am Crash, and these are the Boys.
Wallace Wells: [shouting] Is that girl a boy, too?
Lucas Lee: Prepare the feel the wrath of the League of Evil Ex’s!
Scott Pilgrim: The what?
Lucas Lee: You seriously don’t know about the League? Seven evil ex’s? Coming to kill you? Controlling the future of Ramona’s love life?
Scott Pilgrim: No…?
Lucas Lee: Really? [offers his hand to Scott] Hey, man, don’t worry about it.
Scott Pilgrim: Really?
Lucas Lee: Yeah! Let’s go grab a beer.
Scott Pilgrim: That’s awesome!
Lucas Lee: [punches Scott as he gets up, laughing with glee]
Envy Adams: [singing on stage] Hello again, friend of a friend, I knew you were! Our common goal, was waiting for, the world to end! Now that the truth, is just a rule, that you can bend! You crack the whip, shape shift and trick, the past again! Send you my love, on a wire. Lift you off, everytime…everyone pulls away….from you
Envy Adams: [singing on stage] Hello again, friend of a friend, I knew you were! Our common goal, was waiting for, the world to end! Now that the truth, is just a rule, that you can bend! You crack the whip, shape shift and trick, the past again! Send you my love, on a wire. Lift you off, everytime…everyone pulls away….from you.
Wallace Wells: [refers to Matthew Patel] Hey. What’s with his outfit?
Some Guy: Yeah, is he a pirate?
Scott Pilgrim: [genuinely curious] Are you a pirate?
Matthew Patel: Pirates are in this year!
The Voice: Not so long ago in the distant realm of Toronto, Canada, Scott Pilgrim was dating a high schooler…
Young Neil: He punched the highlights out of her hair. HE PUNCHED THE HIGHLIGHTS OUT OF HER HAIR!
Scott Pilgrim: You once were a veg-on but now you will be gone
Todd Ingram: ve-gon? [Scott Headbutts Todd][Todd Explodes]
Todd Ingram: Ve-gon? [Scott Headbutts Todd] [Todd Explodes]
Roxy Richter: (Shouting to Ramona) Your BF is about to get F-ed In the B!
Roxy Richter: [shouting to Ramona] Your BF is about to get F-ed In the B!
Ramona Flowers: Say bye to your gay friends for me.
Stacey Pilgrim: Gay friends? *looks left sees Wallace and boyfriend making out* WALLACE, AGAIN?!
Scott Pilgrim: This is, this is, this is…
Wallace Wells: What?!
Lucas Lee: This is boring.
Crash: This song is called “I Am So Sad, I Am So Very Very Sad”. It goes a little something like this…[song begins] SO SAD! [song ends] Thank you.
Crash: This song is called ‘I Am So Sad, I Am So Very Very Sad’. It goes a little something like this…[song begins] SO SAD! [song ends] Thank you.
Wallace Wells: It’s not a race, guys!
Crash: All right, this next song goes to the guy yelling from the balcony. It’s called, “We Hate You, Please Die.”
Crash: All right, this next song goes to the guy yelling from the balcony. It’s called, ‘We Hate You, Please Die.’
Wallace Wells: Sweet! I love this song!
Kim Pine: [bored] We are “Sex Bob-omb.” We are here to make money and sell out and stuff.
Kim Pine: [bored] We are ‘Sex Bob-omb.’ We are here to make money and sell out and stuff.
Scott Pilgrim: Sweet, coins!
Roxy Richter: Every Pilgrim reaches the end of his journey. Some sooner than others.
Envy Adams: Hey Ramona i like your outfit, affordable?
Envy Adams: Hey Ramona I like your outfit, affordable?
Kim Pine: If your life had a face I would punch it.
Wallace Wells: I want to have his adopted babies.
Knives Chau: I’ve never kissed a guy,
Scott Pilgrim: Hey, neither have I.
Scott Pilgrim: You are blowing up…..RIGHT NOW!
Scott Pilgrim: You are blowing up… RIGHT NOW!
Stephen Stills: Hey man question I’ve always wondered how does not eating dairy products give you psychic powers?
Todd Ingram: Ok, right you know how you only use 10% of your brain? Well the other 90 is filled with curds and whey
Todd Ingram: Ok, right you know how you only use 10% of your brain? Well the other 90 is filled with curds and whey.
Roxy Richter: I’m sending you back to Gideon in a thousand pieces you slag!
Stephen Stills: We shouldn’t even be here. We shouldn’t even BE HERE!!!
Scott Pilgrim: Come on man!*slap* I put my promises aside for the music!*slap* If I can do that we can do anything.
Scott Pilgrim: 2 gin and tonics please.
Scott Pilgrim: Two Gin & Tonics, please.
Ramona Flowers: I thought you didn’t drink.
Scott Pilgrim: Gideon’s here? Where?
Kim Pine: That geeky guy next to your girlfriend.
Scott Pilgrim: That’s Gideon!? Gideon is G-Man!?
Wallace Wells: [after performance of ‘I’m so sad, so very, very sad.’] IT’S NOT A RACE, GUYS!
Wallace Wells: [after performance] It’s not a race, guys!
Scott Pilgrim: I love garlic bread. I could honestly eat it all the time nonstop.
Ramona Flowers: Then you’d get fat.
Scott Pilgrim: Why would I get fat?
Ramona Flowers: Bread makes you fat.
Scott Pilgrim: Bread makes you fat!?
Scott Pilgrim: Your kidding. Anyone can be vegan.
Todd Ingram: Ovo-lacto vegetarian maybe
Scott Pilgrim: Ovo what?
Todd Ingram: I partake not in the meat nor the breast milk nor the ovum of any creature with a face
Todd Ingram: I partake not in the meat nor the breast milk nor the ovum of any creature with a face.
Envy Adams: Short answer, being vegan just makes you better than most people
Envy Adams: Short answer, being vegan just makes you better than most people.
Todd Ingram: Bingo
Todd Ingram: Bingo.
Scott Pilgrim: You and Her?
Scott Pilgrim: You know her?
Ramona Flowers: It was a phase…
Ramona Flowers: It was just a phase.
Scott Pilgrim: You had a sexy phase?
Scott Pilgrim: You had a sexy phase?
Lucas Lee: Okay, you listen up and you listen hard, bucko! The next click you hear will be me hanging up. The one after that, will be me pulling the trigger!
Roxy Richter: Next time I’ll be deadly serious next time!
Roxy Richter: Because next time, I’ll be deadly serious next time.
Scott Pilgrim: What?
‘Cause… it’s Friday now, she’s the weekends off, so… Monday, right? – Todd Ingram
Because you’ll be dust by Monday… because you’ll be pulverized in two seconds. The cleaning lady? She cleans up… dust. She dusts. – Todd Ingram
You will pay for your insolence! – Matthew Patel
Before you hear some dirty lies from someone else, yes I’m dating a 17-year-old. – Scott Pilgrim
Defeat your seven evil exes if we’re going to continue to date? – Scott Pilgrim
Truth is…it was me who was obsessed. I was crazy about him. But he ignored me. I was more alone when we were together than I ever was on my own. That’s why I had to leave. And that’s when he started paying attention. – Ramona Flowers
What, a coffee? Hollie, I have some bad news. I hate you, okay? – Bryan Lee O’Malley, ‘Scott Pilgrim, Volume 2: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World’.
Can we go out sometime? Or, I mean, I mean… Can we maybe just hang out? – Bryan Lee O’Malley
Dude… Things never were the same. Change is… It’s what we get. – Bryan Lee O’Malley, ‘Scott Pilgrim, Volume 6: Scott Pilgrim’s Finest Hour’.
It was football season, and for some reason, all the little jocks wanted me. Matthew was the only non-white, non-jock boy in town. So the two of us joined forces, and we took ’em all down. – Ramona Flowers
He only likes her because she’s old! She’s probably, like, 25! – Knives Chau
Okay. From here on out, no girlfriends or girlfriend talk at practice, whether they’re old, new, or new-new. – Stephen Stills
Dude, I can see in your mind’s eye, that you put half-and-half into one of those coffees in an attempt to make me break Vegan-edge. I’ll take the one with soy. – Todd Ingram
Obviously one of us went to Professor Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters and one of us didn’t. – Bryan Lee O’Malley
Listen to this, okay? Just listen. You hear that? That’s market bacon hitting the pan. Today a child is born unto us, and his name will be bacon. – Bryan Lee O’Malley
What kind of idiot would knowingly date a girl named Knives? – Bryan Lee O’Malley, ‘Scott Pilgrim, Volume 2: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World’.
Scott suddenly realized for the first time, that all second cup exteriors do not lead to the same second cup interior. – Bryan Lee O’Malley
There’s a guy over there with a samurai sword. – Bryan Lee O’Malley
FAQs about Scott Pilgrim Vs The World Quotes
Is Scott Pilgrim asexual?
Was Scott Pilgrim vs. the World a flop?
What is the deeper meaning of Scott Pilgrim vs. the World?
Is Scott Pilgrim vs. the World satire?
Is Ramona a manic pixie dream girl?
Although Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World was not a box office success but has become a cult classic. The film’s charm lies in its witty dialogue and faithful adaptation of Bryan Lee O’Malley’s source comic. If you’re a fan of the comic or the movie, check out Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World: The Game, which will be re-released soon.